ACCORDING TO ZAC

That Facebook keeps showing me what I posted last year and the year before that is both funny and a little creepy. I'm not sure I want them digging through my past, even though I consciously used their website to share it with the world. But I digress. Apparently at this time last year I was bitter and resented UA. Two years ago I was trying to do some good in the world. I'm not sure where I am today. Mostly sleepy, I guess, with a good helping of happiness.

A woman after my own heart. :) P.s. These are cocktail napkins at some goofy gift shop at La Encantada.

I'm reading a book right now called I Am the Messenger . It's only okay, but there are some really excellent pop culture references. Today's stand out reference was this: He's gigantic, and to be honest, I can't tell if it's a man or a woman. In fact, from a distance, he looks like Mimi from The Drew Carey Show . I'm really sad for any man that looks like this, but in a way, I really want to see him.

One time, a bunch of Facebook friends anonymously answered weird questions about me. They were funny. Jog your memory , if you'd like. Today I got another one of those things posted on my wall and I thought this one was hysterical. Truth be told, I don't think anyone is manlier than Serena Williams. Hahaha

Let me preface this by saying I've never preordered anything except pizza. However, today I preordered Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 on Bluray from Amazon. While I would say that my $10 credit to Amazon and their awesome shipping that allows me to get the movie the same day it's released without having to go to a store were the real reasons I ordered it, that's just a lie. I ordered it because I'm a teenybopper that loves the Harry Potter series. Though the credit and shipping were particularly exciting bonuses, hahaha. Friday can't come soon enough!

Let me tell you why today was excellent. The reasons why today was good happen to also involve why Tanner is basically my favorite person ever. 1. Tanner called some people "assholes" of his own free will. Totally unexpected. Funniest moment of my life. 2. Tanner also said that even if a politician was Jesus, the Democrats wouldn't like him. Also funniest moment of my life. My eyes might have watered a little bit because of how funny it was (which is bad while driving). I took a test and spent 12 hours away from home, which is entirely too long, but still had a fantastic day. I'm a lucky guy.

It's cold. I know, I know, Kelsey , you're scoffing right now, but this is a big deal to Tucson people! Also, my brother just called, and the first thing my dad said to him was, "I'm freezing my balls off!" My family is the best. :)

There are a few things that are really fun about being the only child at home. For instance, my input is always taken into consideration when discussing what to make for dinner. It's not always the definitive plan, but it's at least considered. All that aside, some of my favorite time spent with my parents is when we sit in the family room watching television. Most often we are watching HGTV, talking about what we like/don't like about the designer's plans, and one of us is almost always asleep at any given time. Tonight was no different. The three of us sat and watched President Obama's State of the Union address. Someone was sleeping during parts of the speech, either Mom or Dad. Surprisingly there was no dialogue until after his speech, but it was just like any other night. And I wouldn't have it any other way. :) Side note: the funny little addition to our normal television watching formula is that I was reading my New York Times instead of listening to...

Another glimpse at my future career from this website . Reporter 1: “Lightning is going to come through that window any second now.” Reporter 2: “That’s why we have thick, double paned windows. To protect us from God’s wrath.”

This one time, I blogged about a Costco adventure I'd write about later. This time , to be exact. One disgruntled blog reader commented and complained that I probably wouldn't actually blog it, since I said I'd blog about my adventure in a busted elevator on campus. Well... it's true that I never got around to blogging the elevator experience... It would just take freaking forever to type up, okay! But this is short, and something that I found hilarious. Without further ado, the Costco story: Here I go, cruising into Costco on Friday afternoon. This is the fourth time in two weeks there. That is entirely too many times to go to Costco during the holiday season. But, I was going to look for something specific you can only get at Costco (cheap movie tickets, FYI). Also, I had plans for lunch. I love Costco pizza (which I never ended up getting, the line was too long). Anyway, as I'm walking in, I hear a mom say this to her child: They're handicapped. It mean...

I was at Costco today and heard this: Middle aged woman to husband: I don't need you by my side at all times! Middle aged man to wife: I know! And I wasn't even eavesdropping since they said it above normal talking volume. I feel like that's how I'm going to be when I'm crotchety and middle aged. I kind of look forward to that point. Haha. This is also a quick note to everyone in the Costco parking lot today. It would have been really hard for you to have: driven slower stolen a better spot walked in the middle of the road, blocking traffic and generally piss me off more than you did. But I picked up our Christmas cards (that I designed -- they're awesome), and was seriously surprised that the people inside didn't piss me off as much as normal! Overall, it was a nice Costco trip, which is generally kind of rare. I was even kind of happy when I left the store. Weird! Hahaha.

Today I got stuck in an elevator. More to come on that later, because it was kind of cool. :)