Legacies

I’ve been reading a Mormon site called By Common Consent. It’s generally a place for honest introspection and spiritual questioning without disparaging anyone on either side of the theological issues facing Mormonism.

I just read one article about the legacy of President Thomas S. Monson, who passed away in January. The author suggested that a lot of the big controversies the Church was involved in over the last several years might not have really been spearheaded by President Monson, and that he’s getting a bad rap for being the figurehead of the modern Church at the time that these situations were unfolding.

Perusing the comments of articles such as these can prove dangerous. People say terrible things about our beliefs and about each other, depending on the site you might be looking at. The last thing I want is some online troll causing me to question my faith. I can do that all on my own without a stranger’s help.

In a shocking twist, however, I was uplifted by one commenter’s remarks that I found today:

According to Elder Bednar, when you are too old to do everything you used to do, you do what is most important. So what were the last things President Monson spoke about in conference? 1. “The Power of the Book of Mormon.” and 2. “Kindness, Charity, and Love.” Those must be the most important messages he wanted to communicate in his final addresses.

There are many complexities that I don’t understand regarding how the leadership of the Church makes decisions and moves forward. Fortunately (or to critics of the Church, unfortunately), those misunderstandings haven’t caused me to radically question my membership here, the reality of God and His Son, nor the truthfulness of the Mormon Church generally.

Even still, I was tremendously grateful to read those words and feel a sweet confirmation that though there are many things I don’t yet understand, the messages that President Monson chose to highlight over the course of his time as the prophet of the Church, and his many, many years of active involvement in upper-level leadership often boiled down to the beautiful principles of service and love. That his last General Conference address was about the Book of Mormon seems to underscore the message that we should go about doing good, both for others, as well as for ourselves. Steeping ourselves in the Book of Mormon will bring us great blessings, just as charitable actions towards our neighbors will.

I taught Gospel Doctrine last month, and we discussed King Benjamin’s sermons in the first several chapters of Mosiah. I asked class members to review important doctrines explained in those chapters and to consider why he would want to include those topics in what he knew would be his final address to his people.

The poignant nature of that online commenter seems especially strong in considering this pattern: while we don’t know or understand everything a leader does (whether ancient or modern), can’t we glean a bit about his or her nature based on what he or she opted to emphasize most emphatically?

In the case of President Monson, I agree with much of the Mormon world – his emphasis was to love, to give and to do so without reservation.

These thoughts are coming on the heels of an experience I had last night in which a ward member, a convert of just under two years, made it a point to come to Family Home Evening to shake my hand. He did it as a farewell; he has decided that he needs to step away from the Church for a time. He spoke with a small handful of ward members he respected and who hadn’t alienated him. Then he left.

Frankly, I was shocked to be among those people he wished to bid farewell and part on good terms with. While I hadn’t made particular efforts to ostracize him, I also hadn’t necessarily done much to help him either.

When I expressed this surprise to my bishop he said, “You’re a magnet to everyone.” He said it like it was something I should have known. I was really floored by that; humbled, to say the least.

I don’t want to make light of my fellow ward member’s struggles and toot my own horn. He is hurting. My heart aches for him, and I wish I could do something to right these wrongs, to help him find answers to his questions. But I can’t deny the value of these experiences.

In the wake of President Monson’s passing, and in the diligent pursuit to live up to being a “magnet to everyone,” I want my legacy to be one of generous giving and love. Serving others isn’t something I’m always inherently good at, but I see and understand its immense value because of the many times I have been on the receiving end of that kindness.

The Savior’s life was dedicated to ministering to those that needed to be lifted and changed. President Monson’s life mirrored that dedication to lifting up those that struggle. I inadvertently did the same for my ward member through small acts of decency, respect, and kindness. But I want to make that a more inherent part of who I am and how I live, so that I never have to think that I did something that pushed someone away.

Should I ever have much of a legacy, I hope it can be synthesized neatly like the online commenter did with President Monson. Sure, I’ll make mistakes, and people won’t understand everything that I’ve done. But I hope the salient points have something to do with being gracious, with being slow to judge, with extending the decency all of God's children deserve.