Putting it in Action
Something that continues to astound me is how immediately I’m put to the test after I spend time thinking about something I think is really important, especially in regards to working with other people. For many months, I’ve been telling myself how critical it is to lead with love and make assessments later in an attempt to prevent myself from making assumptions that are based wholly on my initial emotions instead of on actual facts and the commonalities that should be binding us together.
I used that mantra of “love first, react second” all throughout the difficult election season that somehow continues to this day. I’ve done my best to also use that idea in church settings where I hear leaders say things that I don’t totally agree with. And in both instances, I’ve recognized how listening to other people’s viewpoints with open mindedness doesn’t detract from what I might feel or believe, but instead helps me become more compassionate and capable of meaningful connection by preventing such swift and unjustified demonization of them as people.
This week, there was protesting and finally unauthorized entry by some of those same protestors at the US Capitol, as tensions continue to run high in the realm of national politics. All day, I was upset by what was happening, and I had strong feelings about my superiority and “correctness” regarding my viewpoints on the whole situation. As I sat down that night to read the next General Conference talk in the session I’m studying, it happened to be Hearts Knit in Righteousness and Unity by Elder Quentin L. Cook, where he practically reinforces verbatim the idea that I have to lead with love. I was so grateful for the reminder on a day that I wasn’t practicing what I already knew to be so important.
I used that mantra of “love first, react second” all throughout the difficult election season that somehow continues to this day. I’ve done my best to also use that idea in church settings where I hear leaders say things that I don’t totally agree with. And in both instances, I’ve recognized how listening to other people’s viewpoints with open mindedness doesn’t detract from what I might feel or believe, but instead helps me become more compassionate and capable of meaningful connection by preventing such swift and unjustified demonization of them as people.
This week, there was protesting and finally unauthorized entry by some of those same protestors at the US Capitol, as tensions continue to run high in the realm of national politics. All day, I was upset by what was happening, and I had strong feelings about my superiority and “correctness” regarding my viewpoints on the whole situation. As I sat down that night to read the next General Conference talk in the session I’m studying, it happened to be Hearts Knit in Righteousness and Unity by Elder Quentin L. Cook, where he practically reinforces verbatim the idea that I have to lead with love. I was so grateful for the reminder on a day that I wasn’t practicing what I already knew to be so important.
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| An image of the occurrence taken from the New York Times. |
I earnestly believe that while I can condemn the decision(s) made by protestors this week as inappropriate (a word I find woefully inadequate for the severity of what happened), that I can choose to not vilify them as people. I can decide not to hate the political party they’re affiliated with. Elder Cook’s message inspired that line of thinking for me (again) this week, and I’m doing my best to dislike the act that happened without letting hate for individuals take over.
I brought this notion up in a meeting this morning, about how I’m trying to make love the first thing that impacts how I do things so that I can be most impactful in building God’s kingdom. (To be clear, my thought wasn’t about politics at all.) And guess what... I got the chance to put it to the test literally one hour after I’d spoken it to other people.
In my next meeting this morning, a man tried to make some spiritual corollaries using the recent political unrest in ways that I found to be inappropriate for our setting, and not universally applicable to those in attendance. What’s so challenging to me about making assessments in a church space about current political events is that our individual lived experiences act as filters to help us make sense of them. Because those experiences and filters aren’t perfectly identical among us as members, it means the principle exemplified doesn’t ring true for everyone. My immediate reaction was strong, and my first instinct was to disregard everything he was saying.
And to avoid overgeneralizing, it's worth asking, “Isn’t there value in learning from people who see things differently?” The answer to that is a resounding yes. But critical thinking about current events doesn’t apply to everyone in the same way that explaining a personal story about how God answered my prayers as a tool for teaching and application is more easily applied to people in various states of spiritual development.
I can’t say that I magically found this guy's ideas palatable because I was reminded that I had just voiced the need to see others in the way that God sees them before applying other thoughts and labels to them. But I think it helped slow my brain down a little bit, and will help me continue to recognize the goodness in this man instead of harbor negative feelings for him because of this one occurrence.
Proclaiming that I “love first” is the easy part. Doing it is a different beast altogether. And while I become frustrated at how frequently I have to repeat the edict to myself, I’m grateful to continue developing the skill to the best of my ability, especially in times and challenging as these.
I brought this notion up in a meeting this morning, about how I’m trying to make love the first thing that impacts how I do things so that I can be most impactful in building God’s kingdom. (To be clear, my thought wasn’t about politics at all.) And guess what... I got the chance to put it to the test literally one hour after I’d spoken it to other people.
In my next meeting this morning, a man tried to make some spiritual corollaries using the recent political unrest in ways that I found to be inappropriate for our setting, and not universally applicable to those in attendance. What’s so challenging to me about making assessments in a church space about current political events is that our individual lived experiences act as filters to help us make sense of them. Because those experiences and filters aren’t perfectly identical among us as members, it means the principle exemplified doesn’t ring true for everyone. My immediate reaction was strong, and my first instinct was to disregard everything he was saying.
And to avoid overgeneralizing, it's worth asking, “Isn’t there value in learning from people who see things differently?” The answer to that is a resounding yes. But critical thinking about current events doesn’t apply to everyone in the same way that explaining a personal story about how God answered my prayers as a tool for teaching and application is more easily applied to people in various states of spiritual development.
I can’t say that I magically found this guy's ideas palatable because I was reminded that I had just voiced the need to see others in the way that God sees them before applying other thoughts and labels to them. But I think it helped slow my brain down a little bit, and will help me continue to recognize the goodness in this man instead of harbor negative feelings for him because of this one occurrence.
Proclaiming that I “love first” is the easy part. Doing it is a different beast altogether. And while I become frustrated at how frequently I have to repeat the edict to myself, I’m grateful to continue developing the skill to the best of my ability, especially in times and challenging as these.
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